Take Me to Your Leader

Day 4 Prompt for Diabetes Blog Week

“Tell us what your Fantasy Diabetes Device would be?  Think of your dream blood glucose checker, delivery system for insulin or other meds, magic carb counter, etc etc etc.  The sky is the limit – what would you love to see?”

I don’t really have a “Fantasy Diabetes Device,” but more of a “Fantasy Improvement to an Existing Device.” I have an iPhone. I love my iPhone. It basically contains my whole life in it’s tiny body. Well…not my whole life, but it is quite a contraption that I rely on to wake me up in the morning, give me directions to the shoe store, keep track of my appointments, keep track of my crazy friends’ phone and address info; It is my camera, a means for me to video chat with my family who don’t live near by. Basically a million things wrapped up in one small rectangular gadget. Why not have it check my blood sugars too? I’m thinking a continuous blood sugar checker  for every time I touch it. No prick or actual blood, just my fingertips scrolling around in my normal activities. If I’m low or high it would let me know by screaming obscenities at me until I fix it one way or the other. “Hey! You! Buttface! Go eat something before I punch you in the face!” or something like “Hello to anyone near Emily’s phone. She’s higher than a kite…she needs more drugs. She has problems. Please help.”

Realistically this would never happen. To test my blood sugar it would need… shock… my blood. The phone would have to have razor blades on it that cut me as a I scroll. Then I would bleed all over the screen and it would end up being, well, it would be a bloody mess. This is fantasy though, so no need to get all real up in here.

My other addition to this invention would be an app where I would take a picture of whatever I’m eating and it would automatically calculate the exact carbs in it. Oh the joy that would be! My boluses that I give whenever I eat (extra doses of insulin to account for food ingested) are based on how many carbs I eat and it gets frustrating trying to always figure out how many something has. Do you know how many carbs are in a banana?  a bowl of cereal? milk? chicken nuggets? a restaurant hamburger bun? grapes? broccoli? carrots? your moms house? the stuffed pasta shell you are about to eat? blah blah blah. It is too much, my brain is exploding.

While those were fantasy, there are awesome inventions that are coming out to the market. Through some blogging and checking out of other people’s diabetes business I discovered that there is actually a blood testing machine that connects to your iPhone and when you test your blood it downloads to your phone and charts, graphs, and beautifully organizes everything so you could easily email it to your doctor or whatever else you may need to do with it. Pretty cool. The Apple Store and Walgreen’s carry it.

I wonder if insurance covers it? I dread having to call to ask. Such is the life of the diabetic.


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